To continue looking at real stories from members of the transgender community in order to support you and help with the struggles you might be going through, we spoke to Taylor, who is non-binary/trans-masculine! Here is Taylor’s story…
My name is Taylor. I’m 25 years old and non-binary/trans-masculine. My pronouns are he/they. My story has been a slow but beautiful unfolding. From where I am now looking back, I can see a lot of signs from my childhood that indicate to me now that I was a little trans baby in a cis, heteronormative world. Growing up, I didn’t have the language or exposure to others like me, so it got suppressed for a long time trying to meet gender norms and societal expectations. I grew up pretty sheltered and went to a Christian private school, and played on a sports team that kept me from interacting with many people who weren’t cis and straight.
I started to break out of this in my senior year of high school when I first came out as a lesbian. Then, in college, I stopped trying to fit a feminized expectation that familial/cultural expectations had placed on me and allowed myself to be more masculine, which felt closer to home for me. Around this time, I decided to leave the sport I had been playing since childhood. This opened a path to redefining my identity in many different ways. During my time in college, I took a Gender Studies class and met a trans guy, and then everything clicked. I had finally met somebody and learned the language that expressed how I felt inside. I sat with this for a few years and during that time I socially changed my pronouns to they/them.
At 24, I realized that starting HRT would be the right thing for me in order to help alleviate dysphoria and bring me closer to my true self. I came out to my partner and close friends and I’m fortunate to have loving and supportive people around me. However, coming out can be very scary and unsafe at times. Although I am out to many people in my life, I am still figuring out how to come out to my mom. Coming out is an ongoing process and you have to do it over and over again. This is why trans visibility is important, for the trans people that grew up sheltered, the trans people that feel alone or scared, and for society to accept that we exist and have always existed. Not only do we deserve love. We deserve rights, healthcare, and protection. Gender affirming healthcare and a society that accepts us can literally save lives.
Since starting HRT, I feel closer to home each day. I’ve realized dysphoria hasn’t gone away completely, but my mental health has improved so much with the changes that have happened and I know will come. I’m fortunate to have access to trans-specific healthcare and it has made the medical process fairly easy for me. But again, socially, we have a long way to go. Even at my trans-specific health clinic, I was misgendered on my shot day by the person administering my shot!
To wrap up my thoughts, being trans is not just about going from point A to point B, it’s a way of being. I think it’s important to highlight that gender is fluid and can mean different things for each individual person. My gender is my own.